No, No, Nettie - Eric Stewart

Well the queen went spinning in the whirly bird,

The king said wait a minute this is absurd.

Jumpin' Jehosephat, she’s better than me,

I gotta get movin' or I ain’t gonna be

King of the kingdom, king of the road,

Well, I gotta look smart on the Internettie show.

No, no, Nettie, we got to confess

You can’t go flying in a see through dress,

You’ve gotta be special if you want the press,

Desperate measures make a dreadful mess.

But don’t get angry, don’t get pissed,

We’ll find a way to get you in the Harpers list.

Oooh no, no, Nettie, don’t you fret,

The boys are gonna save you from the Bristol Rep.

Oooh oooh no, no, Nettie, you can’t do that.

Well touring’s boring, gimme a break,

I got to ease the pressure now, for heaven’s sake,

I can’t stop shouting, yeah I’m fit to explode,

You can’t be a saint when you’re on the road.

Hire 'em, fire 'em, let them go,

Staff are ten a penny on the Internettie show.

Ooh no, no, Nettie, you cant do that,

You can’t wear stockings to the Laundromat,

All that 'citement makes the whites turn grey,

Oh Lord above, get on your knees and pray.

Don’t be hasty, walk that line,

The cavalry are coming in the nick of time,

No, no, Nettie, take your time,

The boys are gonna save you from the line.

Oooh oooh no, no, Nettie, you can’t do that.

We got rhythm in the kitchen, rhythm at the wheel,

Fascinating passion with a delicate feel.

Rhythm with the money, rhythm on the skins.

Complicated rhythms when we’re up for a spin.

No rhythm with the women but she don’t give a hoot,

Hey!

Terrorise the nanny in her hobnail boots.

Well, no, no, Nettie, it’s a dreadful shame,

The music business is a silly game,

Better run for cover when the sky turns black,

Swingin' Dave is gonna swing his axe.

This year, next year, the year after that,

The story’s getting better than in Spinal Tap.

Woah, No, no, Nettie, toe that line,

The Basher’s gonna save you in the nick of time.

Oooh oooh no, no, Nettie, you can’t do that.

Oooh oooh no, no, Nettie, you can’t do that.

Oooh oooh no, no, Nettie, you can’t do that.

Oooh oooh no, no, Nettie, you can’t do that.