My Science Fiction Twin - Elvis Costello

My science fiction twin

Is doing better than expected

He captured a little blonde trophy wife

Who’s really very well connected

And when he calls home with his alibi

She says «is this really necessary?»

But she knows that a man can’t be a man

Unless he’s punishing his secretary

He sips in the glow of a '61 vintage

Just as the day is dimming

With every intention of surrendering

To fifty-foot women

Who put the fascination back into my science fiction twin

My science fiction twin

Decided to become invisible

He has my eyes, my face, my voice

But he’s only happy when i’m miserable

The words flew from his mouth

And they were gently gathered by reporters

Trying to frame his once infamous flame

With tattered pictures of her daughter

Her hair is all made out of porcupine

Her figure is fantastic

But as you know, they corrupted her

So they’re being sarcastic

He’ll scream and shout

Everything is working out just as he predicted

Pride and position in the gallery of attempted people

Oh and the pain is so sweet

Better stamp his little feet

And you’ll even have time to pity me

How can you feel content?

You wonder where this fellow went

My science fiction twin

Escorted by his lovely nieces

Filled up his purse dictating verse

While painting masterpieces

His almost universal excellence

Is starting to disturb me

They asked how in the world he does all these things

And he answered «superbly»

He’s trapped in his own parallel dimension

That’s why i’m so forgiving

But how could i possibly forget to mention those fifty-foot women

My science fiction twin