Ghost in the Routine - Free Throw

Yeah, I know I’m supposed

To think about the bright side, 'cause it helps

But I stow everything in a hold and locked up in a cell

Like an actor that is playing a role

Convincing everyone this is who I am

For months I’ve just been faking it all

Convincing them all, making sure none can tell

It’s so, so damn bad

(I fake smile as they walk past)

And I know not everyone gets that

(All my thoughts are a steel trap)

Honestly?

I hide myself away

Then put on a face, pretend that I’m okay

Do you know?

Can you see the glimpses of my hell?

How I owe, owe it to myself to seek out help?

Like a chameleon with its camouflage on

I’m convincing them all, blend into the place I dwell

Not letting anyone see me fall, concealing it all

Masquerading behind a veil

It’s so damn bad

And I know, yeah I know

I really should fight back

It’s so, so damn bad

(I fake smile as they walk past)

And I know I really should fight back

(All my thoughts are a steel trap)

Honestly?

I hide myself away

Then put on a face, to keep questions at bay

I honestly try to be honest when I say that I’m okay

Put on a good face for each day just to keep questions at bay