July Was Mundane - Lady Lamb

I miss the pungent sweetness of that firewood

July was poignant and dripping, July was mundane

Dipping my fingers off a lazy rowboat on the lake

Your birthday girl someplace upstate

Back when I was sure I was a misanthrope

Blaming my displeasures on the strangers laughing loudly in the woods

She walked to the water to watch the fireworks

But I wouldn’t give myself the view, I stayed in bed listening to them

Crack and bloom

I miss the pungent sweetness of that Woodford’s reserve

July was poignant and dripping, July was mundane

Licking my fingers to get all of the icing from the cake

Your birthday girl some place in Maine

Back when I was sure I could win her over with my words

Holding the Portland sun above her in the summer storm

I mostly made her up and fell in love with the construct

And she could eventually tell so she wished me well

And as I gathered up my clothes, another storm began to close

And crack and bloom

Even inside my hands, it hurts to claim the confused, wounded little animal

I’ve been

Baby, I’m devastated for all my trying to change you, trying to make you

The same sorry little animal I’ve been

It’s a feat to forgive me

Am I meant to understand my own head

As I take it from my neck and I begin to deflate it?

Am I meant to understand my own heart

As it sings my praises all day long and I evade it?

Am I meant to understand my own body

As I go out walking in an attempt to escape it?

Am I meant to understand my own soul

As I envy it floating high above me?

And I wonder who will tend my own love if not me?

If I grow it in the lilies just to ditch it in the weeds

And I wonder who would save my own world if not me?

In my morning when I bring it into being

And I wonder who would save my own world if not me?