Not Ready to Die Yet - Mary Lambert

So I slept through the autumn, slept through the spring

I don’t know how it happened but I let it win

All of my life I’ve been awake but not here

I’m not great at living, just surviving nightmares

Slept through Christmas, all of the parties

I’m sorry my love there’s nothing else I can see

I’m not ready to die yet, I’m not ready to give up this fight

I still believe in hope though the voices are loud tonight

I’m not ready to die yet, I’m not ready to lie down

But the fate of the end is I will make it somehow

Shame is gigantic, sits loud in my ear drum

It is not beautiful, I don’t know where it comes from

But I’m learning forgiveness, it’s more than a mantra

Can I be honest?

I don’t think I deserve it

I want to break gently but something won’t give

A marathon of hurt, can I just fucking live?

I’m not ready to die yet, I’m not ready to give up this fight

I still believe and hope that the voices are loud tonight

I’m not ready to die yet, I’m not ready to lie down

But the fate of the end is I’ll make it somehow

I’m not ready to die yet

I’m not ready to die yet

I’m not ready to die yet

I’m not ready…