Jasper's gal - Memphis Slim, Slim Memphis

(Spoken:

Memphis Slim: Say, look-a-her man, do you know Jaspar’s got a new gal in town?

Man replies: Sho' nuf man?

Memphis Slim: Yeah man!

Other man: Well, tell me about her)

Now he’s got a girl, she’s shaped like a hog

Her voice reminds me of an old bull dog

Her hair looks just like, a chinchilla coat

You get close up on her, she smells just like a goat

You know she’s smellin'

Got b.o.

all the time

And she thinks soap and water

Is a doggone crime

Now her ears are so long, her nose is flat

Her head’s so big she can’t wear no hat

Now her jaws are swollen and she’s got one eye

She looks like a wreck that happened, last July

She’s a ugly

Got b.o.

all the time

And she thinks soap and water

Is a doggone crime

Now she must-a been her mother, only child

She should be a gorilla because she sure is wild

Got ways like a monkey, and sly as a fox

She should be in a chain gang, breakin' up rocks

Because she’s ugly

Got b.o.

all the time

And she thinks soap and water

Is a doggone crime

Now she got legs like a needle

She ain’t got no chin

She’s a beautiful woman for the shape she’s in

Her feet look like swings way out on a limb