Alien Probes - Sudden Death

I got probed!

I got probed…

Aboard a UFO (U-F) UFO (Oh!)

Probed, proohhhhbed.

Aboard a UFO (U-F) UFO (Oh!)

Now you thought it was just on TV, and on the big screen

It’s worldwide, biggest problem that I’ve ever seen

It’s the intergalactic dog catcher

Bug eyed extra-terrestrial master with a diminutive stature

+Men in Black+, cut up cows

I got crop circles formin out behind my house

9:01, Thursday night was a real hoot

I was dragged out of bed like a dead prostitute

I was brought aboard ship, looked like a Ford truck

Stripped down to my drawers, what a run of poor luck

Big gray heads, big black eyes

«Uh, what’s goin on?

What’s up guys?»

They came at me with a mallet and a big syringe

And a pointy thing that would make a dentist cringe

Metal prongs, big round gears

They just jammed the thing into my ears

Now every night they pick me up again

Just to do a Roto Rooter on my rear end, leavin me in pain again

I’m all scarred up, I’m missin teeth

9−1-1 thinks I’m a freak

They shove 'em up my nose, they shove 'em in my butt

And this corkscrew device gets shoved in my belly button

3 days straight, 2 long probes

Shoved in places nothin should go

They drill holes in my head, and later on

I always wake up back in my bed, and they’re gone

Why do they always pick on people from the South

What do they learn by shoving a big plunger in my mouth

Man, after a night of being prodded and poked

I just feel like a guy who had a massive stroke

I got alien troubles out back

And I don’t mean the type that we can send back

Is it cause they like my trailer park (trailer park)

Is it cause they like my beauty marks (beauty marks)

Is it cause they like my handsome face (handsome face)

Is it cause they like the way I taste (way I taste)

Wherever I go, they find me and they just won’t let me be

They want me to pee, don’t rush me just relax and it’ll flow free

Whenever I call, the Enquirer to my house so they can see

You know that they all, stop comin so nobody will believe me

Hey, what’s that big light in the sky?

Oh, come on — not again, guys

I just got my nose working again

Well at least let me bring a camera this time

C’mon guys, please

J-just leave me alone for a while