The Guest Rapper Killed The Guitar Solo - The Key of Awesome

In the eighties

When you heard a popular song

You always knew that it wouldn’t be long

Before you hear a bitchin' guitar solo

Then the nineties came

And music got gloomy and earnest

But even shoe gazing flannel wearing purists

Could still rock a one note solo

But nowadays, in the musical break

Producers always make the same stupid mistake

Of having, Pitbull, and Eminem and Nicki Minaj

Buttin' in

Rapping about how great they rap, or something offensive

Bragging about some bullshit that was never intended

To be on the song in the first place baby

The guest rapper killed the guitar solo

They replaced the virtuoso

With bleeped out fucks and yolos (yolos)

The guest rapper with their shameless self promo

It’s time to crank it to eleven

On a stairway to heaven

And deliver my six string deathblow

One, two, three, four

Ding dong, I heard a song

So I answered the call

The rapper’s union sent me here

'Cos it’s the musical law

The record companies are burnin'

But I’m still cash money earnin'

Just spitting verses

While you scratch your head and try to discern it

Why don’t you play that solo

So low that nobody can hear it

You’re out of tune with the times

And you can’t rhyme, so you fear it

And the electric guitar, is an extinct dinosaur

I’m like a wet t-shirt contest

Because I fill empty bars (Oh!)

Sellin' like Don Draper

Hung like a skyscraper

Call my wallet kinkos

'Cos it’s flooded with paper

You didn’t service the song

You merely spoke of your dong

Aww damn it

You got me rappin'

How the eff did that happen?

Never mind, you’r out of time

I’ll take this real estate back

Erase your ass from this track

Ladies and gentlemen Slash

Couldn’t make it

So my main man Dave’s gonna take it

All right I want you to put those lighters up in the air

Not your phones, actual flames

Don’t be afraid to burn your thumb a little bit for

Rock 'n' Roll

And if you make that flame big enough

We can ignite the fire

That brings the guitar solo back from the dead

And kills the guest rapper

I’m not putting down rap per se

You know there was a time

Where rap and rock peacefully co-existed

But that led to the horror of Limp Bizkit

Dude you just talked over my whole solo

Oh, sorry dude

I guess I just killed the guitar solo

I couldn’t keep my mouth shut

I pulled a Yoko Ono (Oh no!)

I won’t let the guitar die like the dodo

Let’s all go together

To the guitar center

Where the solo lives forever

Oh yeah, yeah yeah

I’m home