GHOST - Ryan Oakes

Deadman walkin', straight out of the coffin

Nauseous from the advice, me and the devil been talkin'

Auctioning these toxins, authentic concoctions

Toss back with no caution until I’m losing my conscious

Ominous flashbacks from being taken advantage

But I’m a man and it’s standard to just go put on a bandage

Expectin' that shit to vanish but I feel searchin' for answers

To why I panic when

things are getting romantic

The damage is too bad I’m sick of hearin' I’m broken

A thousand knives under my chest and actin' like I be broken

Don’t fix the emptiness that left in just a couple of moment

But all the demons comin' back I keep on seeing the omens

I’m breaking everything open and try to get em expelled

I wish I could shed my skin and slip up out of my shell

Cause nothing I’ve been trying lately has been seeming to help

I’m scared that I’m already dead in my personal hell

I tell myself I’m fine

I think it’s my favorite lie

If you look into my eyes

You’ll see how many times I’ve died

I pray that when I go

I find peace inside my soul

I’m sick of feeling like a ghost

Stuck in place and all alone

Deadman marching, reborn and resharpened

I guess that’s just bound to happen when you labeled a target

And get burned so bad that you consider it arson

The darkest check me now I’m never lethargic

The hardest was in college, I’d be sitting in class

When competition acting normal during fake heart attacks

When I was flippin' Adderall so I could come up with cash

Put 80p into the beats and 20 up in the stash

So when it passed, I could dip out to the West and be leavin'

Nothin' ever 'pared me for the best-kept secret

The city of angels was only full of these demons

Up on my lone self post because Hollywood’s bleedin'

I wish that I could slow down, I’m always stuck in a rush

The panic might make me productive, but it’s leaving me crushed

My mind is never here, I’m looking like a ghost, and I’m flushed

The scars haunt me from the past, and now I’m scared to be touched

I tell myself I’m fine

I think it’s my favorite lie

If you look into my eyes

You’ll see how many times I’ve died

I pray that when I go

I find peace inside my soul

I’m sick of feeling like a ghost

Stuck in place and all alone